Marks of Motherhood

Hello new and seasoned mommies,

My beautiful little girl is 14months old. This time around I actually emailed myself the birth story a few days after having her (I recommend this). So this one is a little more detailed and feels a lot like yesterday. Which means you are in for another novel so get ready : )

I remember everyone asking at my son’s FIRST birthday when we would be having our next. A few months after that we tried a few times with no success but we weren’t really ready yet. Finally we sat down and thought about the best timeframe to have our next child. We were really hoping to have him/her over the summer after our son turned 2. Mostly because we would be back in our home state and it would be before school started up again. This gave us a timeframe of 3 months to get pregnant.

I religiously tracked my period and took ovulation tests for 6months before we started trying. The reason I did this though was to try and have a girl… (I know crazy!).  Boys are really common on my husband’s side. I was totally fine with having all boys in fact I was told I would all growing up. However my sister in laws swore by the shettle’s method when they had their girls so I figured it didn’t hurt to try it out. I purchased the book and learned a lot about my cycle I didn’t know before. It’s a good read 🙂

The shettle’s method is simple; the farther away from ovulation you are the more likely you are to have a girl and the closer you are to ovulation (or on ovulation) the more likely you are to have a boy. My husband humored me and we decided we would try the method for the first 2 months and if we didn’t succeed we would just try during ovulation the 3rd month. The 1st month we tried 3 days before ovulation. I had spotting, vivid dreams and thought for sure I was pregnant but the pregnancy test was negative. The 2nd month we tried 2 days before ovulation and ended up with another negative pregnancy test. I was starting to worry since it was so easy to conceive our son. Finally on the 3rd month we tried as soon as I got the positive ovulation test. That pregnancy  test ended up positive 🙂 Moral of the story….shettle’s method didn’t work for us. Although we had a girl it wasn’t because of the method (before ovulation instead of during ovulation)

Anyways,  I was not looking forward to being pregnant all summer but we were excited to grow our little family 🙂 My doctor, to be funny I’m sure, told me I was due on labor day…..but from what I could tell it was more like the 8th or 9th of September. Either way my kids seem to like holiday weekends (my son is memorial day weekend). I was really hoping to deliver a little early though since we would be traveling back for school just a couple of weeks after her due date.

My obgyn was a little concerned about us traveling so far back to our home state when I was about to enter my 3rd trimester but it was fine. I was planning to deliver the same place I delivered my son so I was comfortable with the midwives and doctors there.  I purchased some adult diapers for those sneeze and pee moments on our trip and we were good to go:) Side note: The cashier literally said I was a great person taking care of my parents….didn’t care to explain the diapers were for me and my parents aren’t old enough….not even my grandparents. Best shopping experience ever. They are not comfortable or flattering to wear.

Over the summer I got a lot more swollen and ended up with stretch marks on my calves and hips because of it. The heat was killer but splash pads and shade were our best friends! Half way through the summer my husband received a call asking if he would be interested in a farm manager position and that he would work part time in exchange for rent. He was so excited and they said it would be ready for us to move into right before school. My only concern was being  1-2 weeks postpartum by that time.  We felt good about it though and left it at that.

 I didn’t take many maternity pics but did take one at 30 weeks to compare to my first pregnancy with my son.

This time I had made over a dozen freezer meals, bought a newborn cloth diaper stash, and made some padsicles (best thing ever if delivering naturally!) I also put together this basket from target! I had spare outfits, gas drops, nipple cream, lotion, Vaseline, diapers, wipes, burp rag, swaddle blanket, syringe, thermometer,  nail clippers, no scratch gloves, hat, socks, and a whabbnub. I didn’t want to get up for anything!

I had also gotten my son a baby doll. My husband wasn’t a huge fan of the idea at first but it made a HUGE difference with the transition phase. We were able to practice being gentle, holding the baby, feeding the baby, and letting mommy help baby first sometimes. I bought one that had sound effects as well as the ability to be given a bottle and pacifier. Couldn’t find the link

The end never seemed in sight. We hiked a lot like I did with my son and it didn’t seem to make a difference. I experienced so much false labor the last couple of weeks I was pregnant. I had lost parts of my plug and had tons of Braxton hicks. I was having some regular contractions but they never got stronger, closer then 7-8min, or lasting more then an hour. It was discouraging to say the least.

At 36 weeks I was 1cm, 37 weeks I was 3cm. Then I went in at 38 +5 (Thursday august 27th) and was 4cm 50 effaced. My midwife wasn’t very encouraging though said I could walk around dilated for a while and would pry go to my due date. I told my husband we should go for a hike that night anyways. I felt some contractions, few painful ones but they ended shortly after returning home. Took a shower, used my mother in law’s massage chair, watched some Netflix and went to bed.

Friday (August 28th) I didn’t feel anything; pain, discomfort, contractions, nothing. I sort of gave up on her coming early. My in-laws invited us to have panda express for dinner so we joined them in my father in law’s office. Around 6pm I went to the bathroom and said a prayer sharing my concerns once again about having enough time to heal before we returned  to school and had to move. I’d have a little less than 3 weeks now. Went to wipe and saw more of my plug and finally had my bloody show. Told my husband and was trying not to get my hopes up but we decided to go for a walk.

Went to grab stuff from the house and almost instantly started having contractions. They were strong/painful and went from 4-5min to 2-3min apart during our 45min walk. My husband would laugh because he had the timer and I was walking ahead yelling start and stop.  Called my mom and told her that I was going into labor. She told my dad to shower and said they’d be ready to meet us at the hospital. I told her I’d call her in an hour. We weren’t in any rush since I labored 13hrs with my son so I took a shower, started the cloth diaper laundry, my husband took a shower, and I started cleaning. The labor pains were getting worst. My mom called and encouraged us to leave soon so I wouldn’t have the baby in the car. I hurried my husband along impatiently since he also thought we had plenty of time. His dad came and they both gave me a blessing in the end he said “when the time was right” I was a little worried this would be false labor.

On the way there I only had 3 contractions(40 min drive). My parents were almost there so I was going to walk around the parking lot to get things going again. Got out and almost collapsed from the pain of a contraction. Told my husband I needed a wheelchair and so we decided to park closer. Found out the only way in was through the ER and ended up parking farther away. I didn’t get a wheelchair. We got checked in and they hooked me up to check contractions at 9pm. I was having them every 5min and they hurt! The midwife  on call was the one I had seen the day before and said I was at 5cm. Around 9:30 I was getting really uncomfortable moaning, crying and wanting an epidural. They were short on rooms so they hooked me up to an IV first so I could get a bag of fluids in my system before the epidural. My parents went ahead and just took my son home with them since it was getting late.

My midwife and her student helped me breathe through my contractions and calmed my shaking legs. I was feeling really discouraged and made sure the epidural would be ready. I could feel her coming faster. I finally got into an OR room (or soon to be OR room) since all the other rooms were occupied. My husband had to get dressed in scrubs. The nurse was taking my vitals and had the epidural on the way, same guy who had done it before. I was still shaking and my heart rate was high.

It was after 10, like 10:30, when suddenly my body felt the urge to push. I was shocked mentioned it to the nurse but said I wasn’t sure. She went to hurry the epidural. She came in shortly after and I was definitely feeling the urge to push. The midwife and student rushed in. Two other nurses as well. My midwife checked and I was 9.5cm. Only thing keeping her in was my water. I agreed to do it naturally even though I was scared. The midwife broke my water and it gushed out.

The pressure from my daughter’s head was intense I must’ve yelled 3 times to get her out of me (mother of the year award!) Everyone was working hard to keep me calm. I was freaking out with how fast it was happening. I was amazed that the only pain I felt was the pressure from her head.  She made it through at 10:58pm They put her on me. She peed and pooped, as was expected, and I just held her. I stroked her hand for comfort as the placenta passed and they checked for clots. Then they numbed me up to sew the 2nd degree tear. I was still soooo shocked how quickly it all happened.

She was just over 7lbs and we were completely in love!

We got into a postpartum room around 1am.  Her left ear failed the hearing test the first time but passed the 2nd. We were woken up all throughout the night for shots, blood draws and vitals. My family and a few friends came to visit in the hospital. My son was so excited to see and hold his baby sister and was guiding everyone else to hold her as well. We left Sunday morning. 

Her first night at home went really well. She slept through the night from day one!  My son never acted jealous he absolutely adored her!

My recovery was so much faster the 2nd time around. I was able to walk in no time at all and felt great after one week. Wasn’t sure if it had to do with the natural delivery and smaller tear or not. We traveled back for school 3 weeks after and the drive went smoothly, since she slept most of the time. I also sat in the back and just pumped and bottle fed her most of the way.  Took breaks when needed.

Postpartum wise I still had some depression off and on again especially without any family nearby. My husband was also so busy with school. The main thing that helped was getting both of my kids to nap at the same time in the afternoon so I had some time to myself. Then when she napped in the morning I took that time to spend with my son. I still wasn’t sure at times if I was cut out to be a Mom, and spent many evenings crying, but my husband was my rock and we made it through.

My Mom came to visit when our daughter was 2 months old and helped me decorate our home which made a huge difference. We also traveled back for Christmas and my sister came early on in the summer. The first year flew by!

I am amazed with how different each experience is when giving birth. Our bodies can accomplish so much.

Happy delivery,